It's Ok to Be a Christian...And Single

One of the greatest challenges of being a Christian (for me at least) is not always being able to say what I really want to. But this time, I will.

If you haven't noticed, being a youth in churches of Christ is filled with lots of "unspoken pressures". One of those unspoken pressures is dating. Everywhere you look, seemingly inside and outside of the Lord's church, people are paring up. Is this natural? Yes. Is it required of us? No.

God made Eve for Adam because he was in need of that unique partnership in life. Heavenly Father made her as a "helper suitable" for Adam. He saw the need in Adam's life, and fulfilled it by providing him with a wife. How thoughtful of God!

As human beings, we are in need of food and clothing. As social beings, we are in need of a sense of belonging and close relaionships. I do not deny those two very basic facts. It is a natural part of the life process.

But singleness? Is it acceptable? Is it natural? Is it justifiable? Is it emotionally and spiritually healthy? For some reason, I was convinced that to be single is a death sentence to the nth degree. But...it's not.

Paul was single

He was a great man of faith who took a strong stand for God. He used his singleness to bring glory to God (1 Cor. 10:31). He used his singleness to go about strengthening the congregations. He was not distracted by a family. His priorities were not divided. He was content.

He was single

But did his singleness mean loneliness? By no means! He had acquired a family in the Lord (cf. Romans 16:13; 1 Timothy 1:8). As a Christian, Paul was a brother, father, and son. Though he was single, he had obtained the greatest heritage in history: the church. He had found countless mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, brothers, and sisters. He was single, but not lonely!

Don't look down on the single ones

Marriage - as we noticed from the beginning - is a divine arrangement, bringing man and woman together in a life-long committed relationship. It is a big step. It is not to be taken lightly. Never though, in the Scriptures, are Christians given a general comand to marry. Christians are taught how to be excellent spouses (cf. Ephesians 5:20-25), but are never required to marry. (Except in the case of overseers and special servants - 1 Timothy 3:1-13).

So for those among us who do not date, and don't plan to marry, show them respect. Value them for their singleness, and include them in various Christian social activities. Don't make them feel awkward by always mentioning your "significant other". Be thoughtful of their choice to live alone.

P.S. Don't ask people who they are dating. It's none of your business. If they choose not to date, that is THEIR decision, not yours.